Lovely

Sometimes I still listen to the American Beauty soundtrack and think about that damn paper bag. I think about how significant something so plain and ordinary can be. I think sometimes I’m finally here, ya know. I’m finally contributing to society, and, I finally have friends, a boyfriend, and a family who I can understand. I have it all…yet, I feel empty. It’s not depression, or being unsatisfied in anyway, it’s just that I wonder if this is all there is? Is this my life?

I really should do something brave. I don’t know if I can be stuck in the same job, doing the same things, living in the same place. It’s not my nature. I was never like this. I was a rebel and I was only happy whenever I had a new project or something to obsess about. Now, I obsess about a presentation I have to give next Monday or the garden in the backyard, or my relationships with the people I love. I’m missing out.

There’s this change occurring. We all see it, no matter how sheltered or disillusioned we have become, the ice is receding friends; corporations are getting stronger, and the world as we know is losing species at an astounding rate.

The honey bee in America is in trouble. The honey bee which pollinates almost every fruit producing plant, every harvest crop give or take a few things like potatoes and like matters; the honey bee is dying. If the honey bee dies, then our cattle, our pigs, our animals that rely on these crops will also die. And then we are left with nothing. You see, it’s not just oil and gas anymore, it’s not temperature increases and floods, and it’s everything our species needs in order to survive. We’re dying.

I want to leave you with these thoughts on my Friday evening. I want you to think about your actions, because if we don’t, we aren’t going to have a world where it’s safe to live anymore. Our children, our nieces and nephews will struggle; they will suffer. And at this zenith, this epic time, when all life is in the balance, you can no longer turn a blind eye. You can no longer be ignorant because if you are, then all is lost.

I beg you. Think. Take yourselves off the grid. Lobby our governments. Change the world. It starts at one person at a time. I don’t want the people in my life to know who affected I am by this, I mean, I’m sure they are also, but I can be all doom and gloom.

When I mention these things to my parents, who live in the backwards fishing communities of Newfoundland, they think I’m crazy. They tell me they will hang up if I keep preaching these things. I don’t criticize the fact they have an SUV and a large Ford Truck, or that they do not recycle as much as they should, or that they are wasteful with energy, or that we don’t have much time left. I just tell them things will change in their lifetime if they don’t start thinking.

The last Glacier in Germany is melting away. I watch the news today as the German’s were desperately trying to cover large parts of the mountain with a tarp to deflect the sun. They have a couple of years left really; the last glacier in Germany will join the books with many other countries that have already lost their ice sheets. The polar bears are dying. Parasites and opportunistic species are coming back in full force. In fact, the pine beetle in BC is stronger then ever and on the East Coast the Spruce Bud Worm.

I see acres and acres of land failing us. I see the trees we so desperate need to keep this global warming crisis at bay; dying…it’s all I see anymore. I see it so clearly. The death around us and I want to scream at the masses. I am so angry. I can’t do anything only grieve ahead of time so that when the big day approaches, it will be out of my system and I will be ready to react.

My life is nothing but a sham now. It’s going to change. I’m going to see the world before it dies. I’m planning. I’m almost ready. And I don’t care about the responsibility of it all anymore; I will be content working on a farm somewhere, harvesting the land until it can’t support me anymore. I’m happy taking myself away from all this greed and destruction; this consumerism that has brainwashed so many.

Television, Radio, Billboards, Buses, Schools, Sidewalks, anything, it’s all been taken by these giants of consumerism. We’ve all be taken and we don’t even realize it. So how can we do something proactive in a world that has brainwashed us so badly? How can we change when all our youth can think about is the next release of Play station or World of War craft? Our children have been sucked into this void. This awful and dangerous place where it will take strength to escape. They have so many of them now and the numbers keep going up. If you don’t see the dangers, then you are one of them also.